


Lust, Not Love

by Reader010



Category: RWBY
Genre: Bumblebee - Freeform, Dreams, F/F, One-Sided Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-13
Updated: 2015-04-13
Packaged: 2018-03-19 16:51:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3617151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reader010/pseuds/Reader010
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lust, not love. It's all you can tell yourself. It's the only way you can think of to justify it all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lust, Not Love

**Author's Note:**

> An idea that I've thought about many times but haven't decided to actually do it, until now. I hope you all like it, please comment and tell me!

You can't understand how it has come to this. How your light daydreaming, your stray thoughts, have led to the dreams that haunt your sleep. How you, Blake Belladonna, have fallen in love with your partner- no. Not love. It was never love. You've told yourself that one phrase so many times to make sure it's not _that._  You've said the phrase so many times that you know it by heart. You live the phrase, you breathe it. And it's only three simple words;

 _Lust, not love._  You tell it to yourself as your imagination draws her closer to you. Your breathing grows strained as she is so close you can feel her hot breathing on the side of your neck. You feel her fingers tracing your side.

 _Lust, not love._ It is all you can say as a means of justifying this terrible fantasy of yours. The one that haunts your sleep, but serves as your only release. Your only escape. Yang's right hand kneads your breast, and you barely suppress a moan.

 _Lust, not love._ You think the phrase one more time as the girl who holds your thoughts captive almost every moment of your life, waking or asleep, pins you to your mattress. You know you're blushing, even though you can tell you're in a dream. She smirks down at you.

 _Lust, not love._ You think in order to justify your thoughts as Yang's lips come down to meet yours. Just before they touch, you wake up in a cold sweat, and you know you won't be getting any more sleep tonight. 

Slowly you step out of your bottom bunk and into the middle of Team RWBY's dorm. As you head to your bathroom, you turn to face your partner.

As you see Yang's sleeping figure and the strands of hair that cover her face in her sleep, you feel a small pain in your chest. You ignore it.

_Lust, not love._

You'll deny it to the bitter end.

*****

Two hours later, you and the other members of your team head to the cafeteria for some breakfast and to meet up with Team JNPR. As you hold the door open for your team, Yang shoots you her signature cocky grin. Your roll your eyes playfully in response. As you close the door after her you feel the dread try to claw its way out the back of your throat. A moment later it passes, and you let loose a quiet sigh of relief.

Just a usual day.

*****

Like usual, you stay silent for the majority of the Team RWBY and Team JNPR breakfast. You're too busy thinking... and repressing some thoughts that you begin to think. Though it is kind of difficult to think with the hundreds of chatty students in the lunch room.

Maybe you're a tad bit grateful for that.

*****

Your team and you have Grimm Studies after that. You hear Professor Port talking, probably another of his stories. You try to pay attention to him, to keep your thoughts from going astray, but your mind ignores you, instead focusing on your latest dream. You remember her breathing on your cheek. How she pinned you to your mattress-

It takes all your self-control to keep yourself from blushing, yet you still feel your cheeks flush with color. 

You truly are pathetic. You groan silently and place your hands on your head. When you remove your hands, you see Ruby looking worriedly at you.

You bite your bottom lip. "What?" You ask quietly.

"Are you okay Blake?" Ruby asked, getting straight to the point. "All of us have noticed something... Off about you the last few weeks."

 _So they have noticed it._ You think. Then again, you suppose you are a little bit obvious. Plus the others were probably keeping a much closer eye on you ever since your incident before the dance.

"I'm fine." Is all you say, and you know it's a terrible lie.

Ruby doesn't buy it. "Blake, be honest with me."

 _You want me to be honest with you?_ You think to yourself. _How about I tell you about my sex dreams that involve your sister? How every night she haunts my dreams. Is that what you want?_  "I've-I've been having trouble sleeping." You say, and it is technically the truth.

"Oh." Ruby says. You think she doesn't believe you, so you explain further.

"I've been having, uh... Bad dreams..." You say, purposely avoiding the word nightmares, you don't wish to sound too pathetic.

"Ohhhh." Ruby says again. "What are they about?" 

"Well, uh-" You begin, but thankfully Professor Port spots Ruby talking. 

"Miss Rose, is there something you'd like to share with the class?" He asks your fifteen year old leader.

"No thank you!" Ruby quickly replies. For the rest of class, she doesn't say a word to you. Thankfully. Still, you make sure to be the first one out of the class when the bell rings. 

*****

You have to fight for control. Whenever you see her, your partner, it requires all your self-control to not leap at her, pin her down, and begin to act out your fantasies. It is always worst when it is time for Dueling class.

Before dueling class everyone changes from school uniforms to combat gear in a unisex locker room. It doesn't help that it always seems like a show whenever Yang's changing. And it also doesn't help that your lockers are right next to each other.

It is quite apparent to you that Yang has absolutely no shame when it comes to her body. Like most would guess, she actually enjoys the attention, but to an extent. If anyone ever tried to touch her in any... ehem, "inappropriate," way, they would surely be on their way to the infirmary with at least one broken bone.

Whenever she changes, most of the boys, and even some of the girls, try (and fail) to watch her as discreetly as possible. But you promise to yourself that you'll never do that. That you'll never watch out of the corner of your eye and view your mostly naked partner. You'd never take advantage of her like that.

Even though you'd like to so very much.

 _Lust, not love._ You tell yourself again as Yang finishes changing.

Hopefully the phrase will be enough to get you through your next classes.

*****

In dueling class, you discover that you are training with your partner today. Internally you groan. Like today wasn't already bad enough. After a few uneventful matches, your name is called along with Yang's. Both of you head onto the stage and stand off on opposite sides.

"Begin." You hear Mrs. Goodwitch say off to the side of the stage, and Yang charges at you, Ember Celica loaded. At the last possible moment you dodge to the side in a roll. Yang skids to a halt and turns to face you. You draw Gambol Shroud and get ready for Yang's next attack. Like you hoped, Yang charges straight at you again, this time she jumps at you and brings Ember Celica down. You parry the blow with your sheath, and then her next with your katana. After each successful block, you back further and further back, until your back hits the wall. You look at Yang, who is getting closer to go in for a strong blow, and your mind flickers between reality and your fantasies. In your dreams, you have been in this same situation so many times, Yang stalking toward you, your back against the wall...

You don't even have time to blush at the thought, as Yang shoots a training round from Ember Celica's left gauntlet. Before the gauntlet could make contact with your gut, you activate your semblance and a shadow clone appears to take the hit. Except it's not just any shadow clone. Just like on the train, you have begun to use dust with your semblance. This particular clone is ice, so when Yang's gauntlet hit its target, it freezes over and engulfs your partner's left hand, weapon, and wrist. Quickly you rush in with your katana, and Yang pivots on her left foot to face you, when she then wails on you with her right gauntlet.

Ember Celica makes contact with your chest in the middle of your charge. You curse silently to yourself. You really just wanted this to be over.

You backflip up in order to avoid another hit to the ground, only to see Yang mange to pry her gauntlet free. She smirks at you before beginning another charge. Unlike last time, you don't roll away, instead opting to drop to the floor and tripping your partner. Yang catches on at the last possible moment before jumping sluggishly over her legs, where she _oh-so-gracefully_ landed further past your spot on the stage. Quickly you swap your katana to pistol form, and unload a round of shots at the brute. Yang turns and charges one more time, more cautious now. You know tripping her won't work, and she'll be expecting a dodge, so...

Exactly like the last two times, you doesn't move from her spot, watching your partner intently. Then you summon another shadow clone, this time using dust to make it fire, then you step back. Yang, however has a new plan, and before you had even summoned the clone, she was ready. As you jump back behind your clone, Yang plants her left foot in front of the clone and transfers all her motion into a pivot, as she spins on her planted foot. Then she plants and spins on her right foot so she is facing you. Though she wastes most of her speed in the motion, she has just enough that she reaches you before you can do anything. Instead of punching you, Yang tackles you to the floor, where she pins you and your hands to the floor.

"Time." You hear Glynda's voice behind you, signaling that the match ends in a draw. Yang and you both exhale deeply and relax. That's when you realize what an intimate position the two of you are in. Just like in your dream. You try to shake away the thought, but still end up blushing and tinting your cheeks a scarlet color. Yang picks up on your embarrassment, and being the goofball that she is, she winks at you and says,

"So... you come here often?" You roll your eyes at her joke.

You fight so hard to resist the urge to pull her head down, to make her lips meet your own.

_Lust, not love._

*****

When lunchtime comes around, Team JNPR is noticeably absent from the cafeteria, doing who knows what.

Ruby and Weiss are locked in some sort of debate, so you decide to ignore them. You absentmindedly eat your food while you stare off into the distance, at least, until you feel Yang hand on your shoulder.

"Blake?" She says in a worried tone, much like how Ruby had addressed you during Grimm Studies.

You sigh and bite your lip. "Yes, Yang?"

"Ruby told me you've been having some... Bad dreams."

"Your point?" You reply.

"I just wanted to know that if you needed any help, I'm here for you... I had to help Ruby with the same problem after... you know..." Yang says quietly to you.

 _Oh, you had to help your two year younger sister with wet dreams about you, too?_ You sarcastically think to yourself. "Yang, I'm fine."

"Blake." Yang says a little rougher. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

 _Not anything. Definitely not anything._ "Yeah. I know." You respond back quietly.

"Alright then!" Yang says, and the tension in the air seems to just disappear. "Did I get to tell you about your ice clone?" You shake your head, no. "Well you've gotten a lot better with them. My left arm and hand were completely stuck. You don't have to worry though, I'm _all right_ now."

You groan. "That was terrible."

Yang winks at you. "You know you love it." Yang turns away from you just in time for you to freeze up from that word. You're forced to reassure yourself.

_No, it's not love. Not love._

_*****_

You accidentally fall asleep in your next class.

What a mistake.

Even in the classroom, the fantasy continues to haunt your dreams.

_This time your arms and legs are tied down in the bed, and you lie exposed, naked._

_You see Yang stalk towards you, as if you are being hunted._

_"Blake, Blake, Blake. What am I going to do with you?" Your partner say, smirking evilly down at you. "Well?"_

_When you don't respond, you realize you are also gagged. Yang looks at you shamefully._

_"I guess I'm going to have to punish you..." She says, before climbing over you. She teases the burning area between your legs with her knee._ _  
_

_She leans down and quietly whispers into your ear. "Are you ready for a punishment?"_

And just like that, you are wide awake, and you gasp quietly as you swing back in your chair. You feel a slight wetness between your legs. A few other students look at you oddly, but thankfully, no one you know is in this class.

Needless to say, you don't fall asleep once again for the rest of class.

*****

As your final class is done, you rush out, wanting to get to the library as soon as possible.

Fate has other plans.

As you turn a corner, you see a large crowd gathering around something and yelling, you begin shuffling through the crowd to get a better look.

Finally you get through and see what everyone is so riled up about. On the wall, one flustered looking boy is pinning one even more embarrassed girl to the wall quite intimately. Both of them look quite ashamed of their actions, but that's not really what matters to you.

No. Just as you are leaving the crowd and heading to the library, you pick up on a rather annoying conversationalist talking to someone just a few feet to your left.

"What a slut!" You hear the first boy say over the rest o the crowd.

"You think she's a slut?" The second boy asks. You push through some people, trying to find an exit to a steadily growing crowd of students.

"Yeah, why?" You see an exit, and begin to go for it.

"You haven't seen nothing! Now that Yang Xiao Long chick, that's a slut!" At the sound of your partner's name you freeze. At the realization that she had just been called a slut by some stupid Hunter, you clench your fists tight. You then turn around and head back into the crowd, furious.

Once you reach the asshole who said that, you pin him against the wall, but not in any intimate way. No, in fact the amount of force you use is enough to leave a good sized bruise. 

"Ow!" He yells. "What's your problem lady?"

Your eyes burn angrily at him. "Take it back."

"What?"

"You take it back right now dammit!"

You can tell the crowds have shifted to look at you now, but you don't care.

"What do you mean?"

"Yang Xiao Long, my partner, is certainly not a slut, asshole." At the end of your sentence you release him and slam his head into the wall once again.

_Yang isn't a slut. But looking back at the thoughts you've recently been having... No one said you weren't._

*****

You crash on your bed, long since abandoned the idea of going to the library since your encounter in the halls. Your eyelids begin to fall, and you yawn quietly. You can always do your schoolwork this weekend, and besides, you've had a rough day. You more than deserve sleep right now.

*****

Like usual, your fantasy begins again. This time though, it doesn't feel normal. Something is off. 

You look around, you're in your dorm, both Ruby and Weiss are sleeping, and Yang is...

Absent.

You're dreams without her are quiet and peacefully, but they just don't feel natural. You feel incomplete. Empty.

So you sit and wait, and wonder.

Will she ever show up?

The answer is yes, as you find out moments later. The dorms wood door creaks open, and Yang sneaks into the room.

She walks over to the bunks you two share, but, rather than getting in her own, she gets into yours. You begin to prepare yourself to make it through this dream. You recite the phrase once in your mind, just to be ready.

_Lust, not love._

Yet... there is no sex, the usual fantasies are replaced with Yang just being close to you. Yet your heart is still pounding, as fast as any of the other fantasies if not faster.

_Lust, not love. Not love, lust._

Warmth spreads through your body from Yang's and you even begin to purr, (against your will of course.)

_It's not love not love!_

Then Yang repeats three words to you.

"I love you."

And if it's even possible, you pass out in your dream.

When you wake up you're breathing heavier than ever. You're hot and panicking.

_Shit._

_Shit shit shit!_

_..._

_..._

_It might be love._


End file.
